Florida

from riverrun by Jeff Symonds

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by Jeff Symonds

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A man kidnapped my grandmother and took her down to Cocoa Beach She spent the rest of her life punishing anyone within her reach
She lived ninety-three years and wasn’t happy for more than a week Nothing grows on the scorched earth she left underneath her feet
I fetched beers for a series of stepfathers drunker than the last
Learned to stay just out of arm’s reach when I had to walk past
The sag in the one good chair got deeper when each one stepped aside Mom stopped crying out loud after the third one died
I used to drive on A1A doing 95
Wind so loud I couldn’t hear the music while I’d drive
No one out there but me and the bugs and the holy ghosts
That’s the part of that part of my life that I miss most
Spent nights on the beach counting stars like sheep and planning my escape
When the time came to go I had to swallow all of my family’s hate
I got a job at a Publix did my homework and I let the ax fall
I left a “Go Gators” pennant and a space shuttle poster on my bedroom wall
Well, Disney World, Crockett, Tubbs and Elian’s dad
Andrew, the Challenger, and hanging chads
Tebow, The U and Bowden picking up yards
Me and a Ford Falcon that somebody left in the garage
The same hospital that birthed my daddy also spit out me
I spent half life understanding him as a personal warning to me
And now he’s gone but it still doesn’t set me free
I put on his favorite record when I can’t sleep
Florida smells like a root beer can left out in the sun
Florida festers behind me while I try and run
Florida keeps on keeping on without its son
Florida won’t let me forget where I came from
No, Florida won’t let me forget where I came from

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from riverrun, released December 18, 2020
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